Jodi? Stop hallarin' out mi name!

Mi seh!
Mi lie dung inna mi room afta a nice likkle bath, cock up mi foot dem and den mi hear it.
Jodi?
Jodi???
JODI!!!!
Di likkle neighbour bwoy of no more dan 2 years old nuh stop call mi.  Him madda she jus a prompt di poor ting bout, call har, "Jodi?" an him a falla in obedience-ah waah tell di pickeny seh, "In di Lawd mi chile, obey yuh madda in di Lawd!"
Him gi mi a likkle break-all dis while mi a seh to miself seh a hope mi phone nuh ring so dem know seh mi inna mi room.
Hear di stubban pickeney again bou', JODI! A waah bawl out seh, Mi a doodoo! CHO!
But mi couldn't do it caw mi didda read mi Bible, so fi buss dat deh lie deh wud have been counter-productive( and incredibly ghetto).
Mi neh ansa him tho cause once yuh do is a habit fi life. Yessideh dem ketch mi when mi a rake.
Di persistent pickney staat halla again.  Mi laugh to miself an seh," Mi rake fram 12 o'clock tideh, yuh lucky, yuh NAA ketch mi again!"

Mi remember mi odda likkle neighba bout 4 years old when him staat fi sing di "Rain a fall, breeze a blow, chicken batty outta door" song.
Hear him,
 "Rain a fall, breeze a blow, chicken NECK outta door"
"Rain a fall, breeze a blow, chicken HEAD outta door"
"Rain a fall, breeze a blow, chicken NOSE outta door"-hear mi a bawl out a intarup di bwoy chune-"Chicken beak-a beak-nuh nose"
Him neva hear mi so him continue,
"Rain a fall, breeze a blow, chicken BELLY outta door"
Di likke feisty bwoy know seh him aggo buss di bad wud now.  Him staat fi gadda him madda attention now.
Hear yah,
"Mammy, Mammy, RAIN A FALL, BREEZE A BLOW, CHICKEN BATTY OUTTA DOOR"
Him repeat dah one deh bout five times.  Mi deh deh a laugh off mi face.
Him go on fi sing bout di chicken toe an foot dem-"real black man-love Chicken eeh?", mi seh to miself.
Mi get a jolt back to reality when mi hear di lilly 2 year old bwoy a gi out one desperate cry once again-"JODIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!"

Ah naw go cope-mi aggo move.
Mi a pack!
Later!

oh yes!
I am your Jodi!(not his)

Shop'n in 'Madman'hattan!

Out and about on a beautiful January morning, I see it!!!  My eyes make contact with a spectacle of beauty, loveliness, and delicate ecstasy, why, this has to be the most exquisite dress I'd ever laid eyes on. [Insert holy glow.]   I immediately snap out of the LSD-like high when I see the surroundings in which this gem lay.
The unofficial store, like the true church of God, has no windows or doors, for truly the church is the people and the store is...well...the raw bawn clothes-some heng up pon some rusty hanga and di oddas jus lih dung pon one t'in piece a plastic pon di grung.  An dis grung is no ordinary grung, dis is dutty grung-yes, yes all grung was created equal yuh might say but dah one yah deh cross from a dutty KFC-ahhhhh yuh get mi now.
Mi almos' drap dung inna one ditch a stare pon di frack.
I wanted to go over for a closer look but mi neh waah nobaddy spot mi a go line up ova dat deh filthy, t'inking place deh.  Unnu nuh understan' enuh-the clothes were second hand looking and  look like seh dem get rejected from our local Food for the Poor or Salvation Army-dem.did.tan.bad..  The clothes were hung on a fence in a wholly dilapidated area.
After the generous secretion of my pride hormone(pridefrinephrine) wore off, I mustered the courage to approach the unestablished establishment and engage what looked like the owner of the merchandise.  I maintained good distance as this eager salesman seemed to be of less than a fully sound mind(diplomatic skills increasing-woo Jo!)
He enthusiastically showed me his goods, which he assured me were of excellent quality.  I looked at the clothing and my fears were confirmed, dem look wussa dan ol' claat, dem deh look like wah yuh use clean yuh winda an furniture BUT when mi look pon di dress weh did ketch mi yeye...mi almos' ketch inna spirit in front a KFC(dash in likkle tongues an shake yuh uppa baddy vigoroulsy-under a sheet-yeah-spirit!)
Mi did kinda concerned tho, cause di clothes dem looked tattered and worn an mi neva aggo buy nobaddy poop-inna.  But den a ray of light descend from heaven an claat what I would later recognise as a TAG! Wha yuh seh? Mi seh a TAG meaning never-before-worn.  Nuh badda refute it, yuh too badmind-the tag was legit!
Mi seh a let out a squeal of delight and it was sold-to me-the highest bidder!!!!  An mi get ih frack fi likkle an nuttin too enuh.  'Pose yuh see how di frack nice-vintage at dat!!! Glad.bag.buss.and.nasty.up.di.place!!!  No mi naw post no pics fi unnu come bright unnu self when unnu see mi a rock out mi frack! Eh-eh!

So I wondered to myself, do I miss out on excellent opportunities, finds, chances to love, the general beauty of life because of my own preconceived notion of what it should look like, from whence it should emanate, the standard that it should bear?  Why did it take me a trip around the world and back to figure out that this is really what I wanted?  Why was I ashamed to be seen in the hogpen harbadashery but not ashamed to rock the dress? Why did I feel to deny how I secured this fabulous find? Am I this way with other things in life-with my origin, with people, certain experiences that I'm ashamed to share?  Thing is, we embrace the beauty, we must embrace the shame.  We ought to accept and own every part of our life experiences.  Never be ashamed of who you are.  Had I bought this piece for an incredibly marked up price at some fancy named place I would have wanted to share it with the world.  Oh! we say, but we are not defined by our experiences! Yes we are! And I learnt this about myself-I'm all things.  I will not be daunted by society's pressures to conform to their reality.  I will be true to me, and in so doing represent the freedom and detachment from people's expectations that should be characteristic of my life.
Madman! I salute you, you contributed to my life!  Big up yuh store-less store-yuh ting a shat!

Guess wha nuh? When mi google di brand- ah one top-a-di-line French company mek it enuh! and den memba seh there was no changing room enuh so yuh a buy pon so-so faith!!! Di frack fit mi like a glove.  Was made just for me! A bayyyyy!!!

Open yuhself to di expanse of di universe.  Never limit yourself.  There is beauty ALL around AND in the most unexpected places.

Much love ma peops!

I am your Jodi!

Liva (Liver) Lip

If any body eva call yuh liva lip-a nuh good sinting!!!!  Liva lip alludes to heavily endowed lips that lack characteristic appeal.  No! Nobaddy neva yet bright demself fi call mine dem dat!

I'm not here to present a discourse on large, unshapely lips, I'm here to discuss a different type of liva lip.  This concept takes the word liver from a different perspective, as in, something/someone that lives deliberately and unapologetically. I'm speaking to harnessing the power of the tongue, nay, lips, to create life!
Made in the image of God, we're capable of speaking worlds into existence.
This is an encouragement to us all to use our lips to create the life we envision for ourselves.  Speak life.

I am still your Jodi.

Kisses

Almost died at my funeral

Shall we gather at the river.......
Chune!

Recalling my youthful childhood days, I marvel at the person I've become.  I'm not half as reticent as I used to be, I'm far more vocal and more free in expressing a passionate stance.  I've grown some.... I'm more open to taking risks and have turned deeper within-I'm somewhat of a loner for those who don't know.  I've developed more confidence in myself and the ability vested in all God's children to 'get back up again', some call it the resilience factor, my devotional today calls it the 'iron will'.

Certain experiences in life have contributed to the restructuring of certain parts of me, I'm more aggressive, can tend to be less trusting and believing.  I'm more calculated in my movements-still very much spontaneous, but I'm more choosy decisive in living out my voracious appetite for freedom.  Freedom is perhaps one of the most important tenets to which I subscribe.  Any threat to my freedom is a threat to my life.

An infringement on a person's freedom of speech, movement, choice and being is 'anti-good'.  God Himself respects our freedom of choice.  Removing that from mankind is transforming free moral agents into robots.  This is lifeless existence.

I died-almost.  For a brief moment I succumbed to the desires of them who needed me to walk a path void of passion and freedom.

I cried a tear-less cry, because it felt unnatural and I was incapable of experiencing any joy.

I cried harder because I could not accept that I had just rid myself of my God-given faculty.

I climbed out of that coffin prepared for me by those desiring my captivity.  I stopped crying.  I laughed at the previously joyful mourners who subsequent to my escape wept bitterly.

A new resolve.

No! I'm not living for anybody-I'm pleasing my God firstly then me/

Living ma life like it's golden....

I'm yours baby!!!! I am your Jodi!

Seasoning Greetings!

Hey guys!!!!

Long time mi nuh pos' eeh?

Well, mi jus drop een tideh fi bless all a oonu UP!

Seasoning greetings to all my spicy folk-all ma paprikas, pimentos, gingers, gyawlicks, onions an' scotch bonnet peops!

You all have enriched my life, just by stopping by to extend your ears to my tales.

I love and appreciate you all!

Thanks for the support and may this season yield uncommon favour and supernatural blessings!

You are mine, and I am yours, your Jodi, now and forever.  Forever? Forever!

Toodles....

Dip inna di healin' stream

Mi SEH!!!

Mi haffi get dis offa mi ches' but it neva safe fi approach di page while mi did still bex.  A pure indecent tings didda crass mi mind!
Afta mi leff mi yaad come a country in seek of wuk, mi come fi hear seh, nuttin naw go gwaan!!!!!
Eeh?
Mi waah bawl an cuss an lif' up mi frack simultaneously.  Mi cyaah deal wid suh much gyawbage.  Come een like mi ha' one sign heng pon mi farrid mark"City Dump".  Mi tell one a mi fren dem seh me is a qualified, certified laughing stock.
Box yuh neighbour if yuh know wah mi a talk bout...nuh tell nobaddy seh mi tell unoo fi tear dem wid lick enuh!!! Mi nuh able...
Boy mi get a save when mi fren come in pon di scene.  She reminded mi how Naaman did haffi dip seven times inna di murky water.  Sometimes when wi a buck di crasses dem back a dem one anedda a dip wi a  dip inna wi likkle dirty Riva Jordan.  Six times naw go do it- a seven times.  So crasses can walk in sevens too!!!  An ask if mi naw dip inna fi mi dutty Ganges riva-(apologies to my small readership in India, and Hindus from sweet T&T....mi nuh have none from Bangladesh so mi gud)

Or maybe wi a lick a Job season, when wi haffi showcase seh a nuh fish an' bread wi a serve God fah!
God nuh wicked!!!! Mi SURE a dat!  Him nuh love see people suffa-mi believe seh dat bleed Him heart big time.  But wi haffi get tested.
Bwoy mi fail dah tes' yah star!
Wi haffi hol' on during the rough times.

Hennyhoo....
Mi gone!

I am your Jodi, your Jodi, yours for keeps...

Go Sof'

These days I’m hearing plenty about the ‘go-hard’ phenomenon, and, and well, I like it!

It suits my personality-the fierce go-getter that I am.  I am inclined to go after my dreams with an unquenchable tenacity, an undisputable resolve that will most times be impenetrable to roadblocks, insults and pain.  Affixed to this mantra is passion, aggressiveness/assertiveness, stick-to-itiveness to which I am not averse.

So we’ve all bought into a hardcore mentality which is great, but as I sat contemplatively last evening a thought danced across my mind, ‘Go soft Jodi’.  Go soft?  Go which freackin’ soft-aint nobody got time fo’ dat!!!!!!! (that’s right Sweet Brown, I got you girl ;-) )  I tried to shake that lame proposition.  I.am.not. going.soft.  Then the go soft philosophy came back to me this morning-yes hounded me from all di way from desso to yasso(the ‘Go soft’ fairy ah go haad wid di ting yow)and I finally had to concur.

What does going soft really mean?

For me, it is an encouragement to go human-I can be so mechanical in pursuing my interests that I lose that gentle sweetness.  

Going soft means to become vulnerable-these aren't the things I want to hear, especially when EVERY TIME I allow myself to become vulnerable, I get hurt-happens EVERY TIME!  

Going soft means being willing to be open. 

It means that I must take my time.  Don’t rush into things quite so blindly-take a step back.

It means that I’m to listen to my intuition.

It means to surrender my own thoughts and feelings on a matter. It means giving an ear to the thoughts of others and lending my heart to understand their pain-even if I get hurt in the process.

Going soft in my mind had such a negative connotation, like ‘go limp’-I HATE THAT! It doesn't even sound right.  BUT, I've now come to terms that it does not for a moment imply that I should become a doormat, or weak, or life-less.  In fact, the more I go soft is the more compassionate I become, the more connected I am to the human condition, the more genuine and real I am.  I evolve into a state of awareness and sensitivity.   I’ll never forget the words a favourite lecturer of mine told the class-your technical skills will get you the job, but your soft skills will keep you there.  Soft skills? The beauty of your spirit. 

From a clinical nutritional stance (mi haffi go deh-‘llow mi), a soft diet is prescribed for those undergoing oral mechanical difficulties-it is modified by consistency/texture to accommodate their needs in order to make food more palatable.  Similarly, some a wi too haad an’ barky barky-too tough, like ol’ fowl-stringy and indigestible.  My life has been going through a little pressure cooking stage where I am becoming a little more sensitive to people’s needs, a little more appreciable to those around who may be a little compromised, providing that tenderness and gentleness of spirit needed to cheer those around me. 

 I am in no wise discounting the sagacity of going hard, I’m calling for balance.  In all your go-hardings, going hards, hard going,cho blow-wow...In all that you do, don’t forget to be civil, gracious, thankful, sometimes a little reticent, understanding, compassionate and simple. Again, the go soft philosophy is not paradoxical to the go hard philosophy but complementary. Do yuh ting, but in a kind way-and don’t forget those around you.

Who loves you like I do?

(chirping crickets)…That’s right!  NOBODY!

I am your Jodi today and always!